I hate to say it, but summer is almost over. The nights are getting cooler and the days are getting shorter and I am trying my best not to be bummed out about it. Luckily, I got a chance to check off all the must-do summer activities. I went to the beach twice, spent the day at the river, went on a road trip, went swimming, and I made it to the Do Over last Saturday.
For those of you who are too lame to have ever made it to the Do Over, ha ha! You’re definitely missing out on life. Not only is it one of the greatest day parties of all time, it’s also the perfect place to get a little dose of ratchet. And everyone needs just a little in their lives.
The great thing about the ratchet found at the Do Over is that it’s ever so subtle. You don’t have people twerk/humping in the middle of the dance floor and there are usually no cat fights over who was looking funny at their cousin’s baby’s daddy’s home girl. But still, you can manage to get in a laugh or two.
Since the Do Over basically consists of getting pissy drunk off sangria and standing in the sunlight for 6 hours, you can imagine how uninhibited people get. People are just sooooooooo friendly after about 5pm. You’re practically everyone’s BFF after 7pm.
Here are a few examples of the ratchetivty I experienced Saturday. My apologies for putting anyone on blast. We were all drunk, I hold nothing against you. *wink wink*
1. A woman I know as a friend of my boyfriend came up to chit-chat with me. I’ve run into her a handful of times and she’s a real sweetheart. Unfortunately, I think the liquor got to her early because she shared a little too much information. I won’t get into details, but lets just say I know too much about the fertility in her family. Drunk talking is always inevitable at Do Over. The good part is most people will be too drunk to remember what they heard.
2. At the age of 15, the good Lord decided to bless me with some pretty decent sized boobies and after I became a real woman, He was kind enough to give me thighs, hips, and a small trace of a butt. Fast forward to Saturday when every chick I know greeted me by either slapping my ass or cupping my boobs. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am guilty as well. I mean, if someone nods their head to say what’s up, you nod back right? So, a slap for a slap. A cup for a cup. *shrug* I ain’t mad, they ain’t mad, my boyfriend wasn’t mad either. #Winning
3. When going to the Do Over, one must plan their outfit out in advance. Don’t wear a sweatshirt you’ll burn up in once the sun reaches its peak and the liquor kicks in. Don’t be like my guy Trox and wear white shoes knowing they WILL get stepped on. Every party is a fashion show, a way to show your own style, but you still have to dress accordingly and one girl failed.
First of all, the chick was taller than me, and I’m 5’11”. Plus she was light-skinned, so she was already standing out like Big Bird at a muppets convention. With that much attention already on her, it was hard to miss the skin-tight royal blue mini dress and 5 inch heels she was strutting around in. Would have been cute after 11pm at the club. However Do Over is a day party that starts at 2pm and the poor child just looked a bit off. Do better next time.
4. Standing on stages and platforms is typically ratchet, but at Do Over, it’s almost expected. Plus, it was my cousin’s birthday, so I climbed on up and shook my groove thang in front of the crowd. We were having a grand ol time until ratchet happened. There was apparently a bachelorette party who wanted to squeeze up beside us and they were nothing less than rude about it. We would’ve pushed them all down except two of the girls were pregnant. *face palm* and to make matter worse, we were being bombarded on the other side by Damian Lillard and his entourage who decided to climb up and get some attention as well.
5. I definitely won’t name any names, but one of my friends was pretty wasted and lost her group. Getting lost at a packed party while under the influence is like a 3-year-old getting lost at Disney Land. So many distractions, no good sense of direction or decision-making skills. So for about 15 minutes I held her hand as she searched the crowd, bumped into a few dozen people and of course, grabbed my ass a few times until she found her group. Safety first!
So, anyway, I’d say that sounds like your typical Do Over experience. Somebody gets drunk, airs their dirty laundry, dances next to an inappropriately dressed pregnant chick, gets lost and molests a friend. Too bad we have to wait til next summer to experience it all over again. Until then, stay ratchet my friends.
#OutHere